well i think it's time to state my opinon about the "friend zone"

The friend zone 

  well being who i am and how i act i find my self being used alot. because of   the shear fact i'm to nice to certen people buy a fue diffent people i had     feeling's for and they knew it but i guess they just could help them self's     but in the end i still call them friend even know my mother hate's all of my   female friend's but i'm friend zoned by 99 % of the girl's i know and the       other 1 % are family you can go thought your hole life looking for the right   person and if you ever do make it out i did once i got used and chagend to     suit her and lost a hole lot of friend's for that i'm not saying it will all   way's happen. girl's if you let that one guy you never gave a chance out of     that zone it could be the best thing to ever happen to you because those       people will never cheat or lie because they cared enogth to wait for you       staying true to only you take for exzample i just let every thing fly by that   i mean i'm dricet to the person i have feeling for and for some reason that's   all way's getting me let down.i normaly just say what i'm thinking but i do     go out of my way to protect people i call my good friend's and famliy. All     right back on topic i guess what i'm trying to say comeing from someone         that's there currently it's a crap place to be not being able to have the one   you love (like)but the see the thing is i all most got her and it felt grate   i was so close well i thought so but she did not tell me i was "friend zoned"   witch would of been grate to know at the time.I'M going to tell you that       story we lived togther and were sleeping togther ( not in a sexual way just     sleep) she moved in for the reason is that i was not sleeping because i         suffer from really bad night mare's and we slowly got closer and closer to     the point where we started to act more like we were in a reationship we had a   fue friend's point that out to us but when ever i brought it up she was         dateing someone else witch was bad timeing on my part so on random ocations     when i knew she was feeling up set i would go out of my way to do random       stuff to make her happy agin like flower's or just sitting there holeding her   telling her it was going to be all right any way we keeped geting closeer and   it got to the point where we could just walk pasted each other and slap each   other on the ass or stand in the middle of the house rubbing random part's of   owe body ( not saying any more then that and never naked) i would love to       know what went worng there but we have had alot of fun and still do but i       guess there are something that just scare people more then other's. at this point the only two people in my life that make me feel alive one of them is her and the other is a person i call my my little sister who is not blood she is ust a very good friend who i spent three year's trying to get a chance with and i missed the biggist clue to say that she was willing to give me a chance and not i live on the other side of the country from her. but my lil sis and the girl where i am have one thing incommon witch is one dic*head after the other. and to all you girl's that say there are no nice guy's out there how about you try looking in the friend zone... because bleave it or not we are hear your just to busy looing at the guy with the best look's or who dose not really have feeling's for you and just want's to get in you'er pants lie me personaly i could not give a flying fu*k about sex it's been over a year and i used to do it more time's in a month and most people do so i can wait for any one who wants me to but now that girl is gone and i'm just board with my time just take one day at a time and don't push to hard for the one that truely feel's right because you might push to hard and push them away  

next time the hole long distance thing

sencrly yours codey mckay        

for whom ever read's this

for those whom decided to read my blog 

beening who i am i rezort to alcohol every time i feel depressed or lonely ( but i'm going to face it witch it all the time). it's not the awser for anything you can only hope someone is there to help you back up when you fall me i'm half cut(drunk) wrighting this i feel like i have lost every thing i've been engaed been in reationship's but there is more to life then just that. those who judge a book from ther cover are no beter then the book them self's you can go thought your hole live's going oh he is cute or fu*k she is ugly. but know this they could be the best thing that will hapen to you. me i go for what's on the inside because that what counts to me sherly because you can be a beutful person but have a fu*ked personlaty. you can spend you'er hole life looking for the one who is right for you but in all realty you could of all ready passed them over because of how they look or how they dress when it come's to love every one need's to make a sacrifice not every one when they met will have the same gear's so to speake it's taken me along time to relize that you never find the right person that you find each other. if you look for them odd's are you find the worng one when the one you are looking for is right there on your shoulder all along stoping you from doing something dumb or from hurting your self last year i went thought a really rought brake up and yeah i wanted to kill my self but one person stoped me. and she was the best thing that happed to me but as it turned out she did not feel the same way so i'm back to square one but in the end i still have people who love me i have been rejected more time's then i can count on my hand's and feet but it never stopped me from looking because i know she is out there some where i just don't know where or if she is tucked under a friend somewhere i have seven atempeds to kill my self i pertty much dieing of being alone i've tryed to change but i can't because last time i did i lost most of my close friend's because i was all mosted marryed to the worng person for me and it cost me alot but in the end i worked out a hole lot worse then i was i was blined by the fact that some one felt the same as i did about them andi could not see pasted that but when it ended witch it did hard i was in a very bad place i could not see the light at the end of the hall but i am a faimly man that's all i want and all i need but i don't know if this will help or not but i hope you see a point to this all i am really trying to say is don't let you'er self end up siting in a dark room wondering what the fu*k happend to my life and where did it all go because it's the worst thing you could possably do get out there and have as much fun as you can keep in mide i'm there for any one who need's it at any time i will reply as soon as i'm awake or as soon as i get it and i understand if you can not talk to the other gender because hey i'm the same in alot of way's it's not about what you say it's about wether or not you have the gut's to say any thing at all like take tonight of an exzample i knowisted the chick from across the bar stareing at me and i did not get up and say hello some time's that's all you need to say  

sencily your's codey john mckay 

discrimination why do people do it

The purpose of my letter to you is to help you see. Being picked on thought out high school and primary school I know firsthand the damages that bullying can do to a person. I for one am with you cyber bullying should be stopped as fast as possible can there have been over 40 death’s because of it since 2003.

A fue mouth’s a go me and a mate of mine got on line and we started to fight back agent it not by picking on bully’s them self’s but by making people day better by talking to them and a lot of them I still talk to and try to help as much as possible can or they let me. Because I know what it’s like I’m a 55 kg male who was all way’s picked on for being too skinny or being called ugly costly beaten down and hurt with is why I defend people I don’t even know rather than let them go thought it alone because I did until I met chris and for the first time in years I felt better about myself at some point’s I’ve been so down I’ve tried to end it all but I’ve all way’s had my friend’s there for me. I guess that’s why I protected other from people from going thought and feeling how I felt I’m not doing much better now. But I have a better outlook on life now then what I did when I was then.
I guess the point in the first part was just a bit of background to let you know where I’m coming from and how wrong I think it is. Something should be done about someone should be out there standing up for people who do not have a fighting chance agents those who just don’t have more of a life that they need to make them feel better by picking on other’s. personally I cannot stand people who do this just for the purpose of making them self’s feel better.
I’m going to conclude this now. I guess the point of this whole thing was that I wish I had other’s to stand agent’s this rather than feel alone trying to defend every one my friends were all way’s there for me I’m just trying to be a friend to someone who is down on them self’s and to make someone’s day that much better that it might give them new meaning I still have that one person I tell everything to even know I can never thank her in person for all the help she has given me and all the time’s she has talked me out of doing something dumb but  I could never get to Canada to thank her